I had my first test today in my WSU class...and I think I did terrible.
The worst part is: I KNOW THIS STUFF!!! If you'd sat me down with pen and paper and told me to write the history of Spain from the Neanderthals to 1492 (and the Spanish provinces and rivers), I TOTALLY COULD HAVE DONE IT! Maybe I wouldn't have every date and emperor down, but I'd do pretty darned well. However, this test was totally different. Things I thought would be on there weren't; things I didn't think would be on there were. ... Bah.
So. Flippin'. Upsetting.
I tried so hard and it feels like it was for nothing. I KNEW at the time that I was messing up, but I just kept thinking: better to have put something down and have it be wrong than leave it blank.
Who knows if Wilks will have them graded by Monday.
I guess the good news is that I have more tests yet to come to off-set this bad score...?
...
Honestly, I'm just so disappointed in myself. This whole balancing work and school thing just sucks.
I'd really like to curl up in bed and stay there for a few days.
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Sunday, September 5, 2010
I think we can all see how well my hopes to post more frequently turned out. lol
Honestly, I used to NEED to blog; now, I'm finding (or rather, used to be finding...more on that in a a minute) other ways to deal with the day-to-day.
Updates:
1) The school year got off to a great start. I literally had the best first week EVER, which turned into the best THREE weeks ever. It's not perfect--because nothing is--but it's been pretty darned good. Parent/Teacher conferences are coming up, and that's always the true test, so I may be singing a different tune soon.
2) I have two Spanish 4 students (which I didn't know, until the day before they showed up, that I would have) in with my Spanish 3's. This means, much to my frustration, that rather than getting the practice they need with the native speakers, they're stuck listening to much of what they heard last year and working on individual projects and readings. Again...not happy.
3) I've decided that I don't--repeat, DON'T--like going to back to school to get my Masters. I would LOVE to be a lifelong student, simply taking classes that interest me or because I can. Getting ones Masters, however, is a completely different animal. First there was drama about whether I'd even be allowed to take Spanish Civilization and Culture again (as an 831L) since I'd taken it as an undergrad as 626. Then there was more drama about getting a Masters advisor (since Dra. Akrabova left a HUGE hole in the department). This, thank goodness, was resolved: I am now being advised by Dra. Myers (HALLELUJAH!!!). Finally, there's drama with the class itself. I realize as a Masters student I'm automatically required to do more work; I just didn't realize that it was work for the sake of work rather than learning. More hoops to jump through. ... Bah. I'm frustrated. Obviously.
4) I'm having a terribly difficult time forcing myself to grade, lesson plan and generally do my day-to-day, single-woman-earning-a-living things that used to consume my life. Some time within the past two years, I just got sick of it. I realize a typical 9-5 job not only isn't for me, but would literally drive me crazy; however, I am increasingly annoyed by all the 'extra' (work, time, money, effort, energy, ...) that goes with my job. I can only spread myself so thin. I pray for guidance and can only assume at this point that if God wants me to find a new path, He will present me with one. In the meantime, I'm treading water.
5) Due to extra stress, lack of anything resembling time and general apathy, I'm pretty much back on my old eating schedule: coffee for breakfast, diet pop for lunch and a real (read: large) dinner. NOT good. Must re-incorporate healthy eating into my life.
Ugh. So there it is. The past month or so.
Honestly, I used to NEED to blog; now, I'm finding (or rather, used to be finding...more on that in a a minute) other ways to deal with the day-to-day.
Updates:
1) The school year got off to a great start. I literally had the best first week EVER, which turned into the best THREE weeks ever. It's not perfect--because nothing is--but it's been pretty darned good. Parent/Teacher conferences are coming up, and that's always the true test, so I may be singing a different tune soon.
2) I have two Spanish 4 students (which I didn't know, until the day before they showed up, that I would have) in with my Spanish 3's. This means, much to my frustration, that rather than getting the practice they need with the native speakers, they're stuck listening to much of what they heard last year and working on individual projects and readings. Again...not happy.
3) I've decided that I don't--repeat, DON'T--like going to back to school to get my Masters. I would LOVE to be a lifelong student, simply taking classes that interest me or because I can. Getting ones Masters, however, is a completely different animal. First there was drama about whether I'd even be allowed to take Spanish Civilization and Culture again (as an 831L) since I'd taken it as an undergrad as 626. Then there was more drama about getting a Masters advisor (since Dra. Akrabova left a HUGE hole in the department). This, thank goodness, was resolved: I am now being advised by Dra. Myers (HALLELUJAH!!!). Finally, there's drama with the class itself. I realize as a Masters student I'm automatically required to do more work; I just didn't realize that it was work for the sake of work rather than learning. More hoops to jump through. ... Bah. I'm frustrated. Obviously.
4) I'm having a terribly difficult time forcing myself to grade, lesson plan and generally do my day-to-day, single-woman-earning-a-living things that used to consume my life. Some time within the past two years, I just got sick of it. I realize a typical 9-5 job not only isn't for me, but would literally drive me crazy; however, I am increasingly annoyed by all the 'extra' (work, time, money, effort, energy, ...) that goes with my job. I can only spread myself so thin. I pray for guidance and can only assume at this point that if God wants me to find a new path, He will present me with one. In the meantime, I'm treading water.
5) Due to extra stress, lack of anything resembling time and general apathy, I'm pretty much back on my old eating schedule: coffee for breakfast, diet pop for lunch and a real (read: large) dinner. NOT good. Must re-incorporate healthy eating into my life.
Ugh. So there it is. The past month or so.
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